Baby!

Been a long break from blogs. However, I have wonderful news to share!

My wonderful girlfriend gave birth to my beautiful daughter. Aynslee weighed in at 8lbs 4.5 oz and was 18.75" long. She is at home and both baby and mommy are doing well.

Here is a picture of my little angel being all serious. More to come!

Windows 7

I have been using Windows 7 at work now for quite some time. I must say, I have never been so exicted about an operating system... ever.

I have been using the OS off and on since beta. And now I use it full time at the office and just recently on my home computer. I have to say, I am still amazed at how solid the OS is.

For those who didnt get their free download in before the deadline, shame on you. You are going to lose out on a very fantastic thing.

The sun will come out afterall

After talking long and hard with my uncle... I gathered my thoughts and finally said all the things I needed to get haley back to me. We both realized what we needed to do and we wanted to give it a try. After talking for a VERY LONG time, we came to our senses and got everything squared away.

It won't be easy still, we both have to be ready to work our butts off to make this work. I am just glad we get the chance to say we did everything that we could to make it work. but we have our goals and we are well aware of whats in store. Lets just hope for the best.


Work related... it sucks right now. Tons of crap going down and its become stressful as all can be. However, I think the next week will slow down again and I can return to normal work. But we will see.

Fun weekend yet... and why?

Spent the weekend with my uncle playing games and visiting his work. It got my mind off of the recent events... sort of. Everything I do I have attached to her. It makes doing everyday tasks very hard and reminds me of the pain she is causing me. I started my job when i started my life with her. Coming home from work to find her ready to eat dinner, or watch tv. It really sucks.

I keep thinking of how someone can just give up on a something that was so special and something we have worked so hard for. It really does hurt more and more as the days go on. But I keep trying to think that she is the one making the mistake and I tried everything I could. But there is still some doubt in my mind that I did something to cause this. Or maybe it was something I didnt do.

The worst part of it all... we wont ever know what could have been cause she left me to go to live with her parents in Washington. I really hate it, knowing you can never try again, knowing there is no chance. Rather I wanted it or not, there is no chance.

I have stopped myself from thinking the three words, saying i miss her, but just cause I dont say them doesnt mean they arent in my mind. It is a terrible thing to try to forget the feelings. All the time we spent together. And forget that she just gave up on me and even more, us. But why... why?

Awww crap....

So it has been far too long for an update. Working on writing more. Now for the updates.

My fiance left me on Mother's Day last week. I have been handling fairly well minus the whole love of my life leaving me to suffer while she goes off to live with her parents.... yeah... Either way, shes gone now, for good. But I am still pulling through. I have been expressing my feelings through song on my mysapce page. It is working for me pretty well.

Trying to find a new place to live cause I hate going home to be reminded that she broke my heart and wrecked me there. I'm not making that much head way cause I have been grieving and playing games. Either way, trying to find a small place above a building downtown. I have always wanted to do it but could never get away with it before. So I think I am going to try to do it now.

Really not having the greatest time in the world. She really did tear me apart. I still don't understand how someone who claims they love you and agree to a marriage would just up and leave without fighting for it. But I did the right thing by not following after her, asking her to stay, cause if I am not worth fighting for... then it's not going to be. One day she'll understand this more, one day she will understand that perfection is unattainable and that you don't put your lover on a pedestal. That is the major reason we failed... she expected way more then anyone can give her. I just hope she realizes this before she puts herself and anyone else through this again.

Signing off now... thanks for all the help from everyone who has given it.

Listen to Alice in Chains - Nutshell to understand my current feelings about the situation.

Holidays.... CRAP!

With my new found glory of being a phone technician... i get to endure the wonderful task of setting up holiday greetings for every one of our customers. This is a very simple task. However, I feel the customers are going to make it more pain staking then it needs to be. With the growth of the company, and the number of phones systems we have installed around the country, I fear its going to be a very long week ahead of me...

Dang....

Well, it has been a while yet again...

Things at work are wonderful. The company has made a few changes that I am really enjoying being a part of. Things will be so much better for all of us once things are going smooth and continue to show promise. Also got myself a nice raise! I am very happy with it and very happy where I am right now.

Things with my girlfriend are still very good. We have some rough spots now and then, but nothing we can't overcome. The fact that we take the time to understand these speed bumps and try to work on them, makes me love it even better. I am glad I can share my life with someone who is so wonderful and caring.

Another league has started for Team Fortress 2 at ArsClan.net. We have a ton of things going on and have seen great improvement with the league. ArsLeague.com is officially up and running thanks to turb0z and Delirium. It looks very well and functions just as good. Hit it up if you are looking for a small fun league to play in with friends.


Thanks